A Momentary Block

I sat at this table in the coffee place and ate my peanut butter cookie and stared off into space for a good half hour today with a block that wouldn't break. I just didn't know what to do with this stewpid chapter Tew. And then it all worked out. There is stuff missing that needs to be written, and whole sections in the typed copy that have been colored red so i know they still need to be edited, and the whole thing is choppy and stupid but its all IN THE RIGHT ORDER!!!

and that means i can move on to the old chapter Two which i believe will now be four. And the old chapters three and four have been completely decimated, pulled apart and tossed to the wolves and now there's just bones and a little fluff of fur caught in a tree branch. gross.

And i've been thinking a lot about the Monstrosity lately and i think it is really pushing me to get the prequel done. because the story i wanted to tell was the monstrosity, and it was the one i told but now i realize i TOLD IT WRONG! and its OUT THERE... being wrong. i don't like it.

I watched the finale of Lost last night with the boyfriend. boy oh boy. I kept saying i didn't want to watch it because i didn't want it to end. Same with the last 15 pages of a really fantastic book. dont wanna read them. I really really liked the way it ended i do believe that the writers DID have the ending in mind when they started. all the stuff that happened in between is pretty inconsequential and they could have easily told the story in two seasons and without a Polar Bear, but that doesn't mean they HAD to. And would we have loved it as much? no. Because in the end it was a really great story about people.

I had lots of crazy dreams last night as a result of watching 4 straight hours of Lost before bed but the one thing that is sticking with me is a line repeated three times in the end. After the protector gives the candidate water to drink from the river.

"Now you're like me"

that's one of those things that is so short, and has so much and so little meaning and i wish that I had been the one to write it...